January is the month of New Year’s resolutions where we set goals that we want to achieve. It is also the month where we focus on Habit 4 Think Win-Win: Everyone Can Win. While the first three habits focused on the private: things we can do when dealing with ourselves, the next three habits focus on the public: things we can do when we are dealing with others. The big ideas in this habit make for a great New Year’s resolution as it is the habit of mutual benefit. It is based on the paradigm that there is plenty out there for everyone and more to spare. You may want to make Think Win-Win into your own personal resolution for 2022.
One of the big ideas of Think Win-Win is to have an abundance mentality. This means that you are secure in your own self worth and that you know that there will be enough for everyone. In order to develop this abundance mentality, you can do the following things:
- Stop comparing yourself to others.
- Celebrate your own unique strengths and contributions.
- Celebrate when other people have successes.
- Share compliments, praise, credit and rewards.
Creating an abundance mentality will also help to build your emotional bank account which is another big idea of this habit. The emotional bank account is a metaphor for the amount of trust in a relationship. Deposits build and repair trust while withdrawals break trust. When you are kind to others, you are making deposits but when you are mean to others, you are making withdrawals. During the month of February, we will be having a week of leading with love where our students will be working on building emotional bank accounts. Working on being kind, keeping promises, complimenting, smiling and saying hello when passing someone in the halls, listening, apologizing when you make a mistake, and forgiving others.
A third big idea of Think Win-Win is to balance courage and consideration. Courage allows you to face difficulties while Consideration is a desire to avoid doing something that will make others sad. While you have the courage to stand up for what they want, you still have consideration for what others want. This balancing act can help you with solving conflicts. When facing conflicts, you have to be able to stand up for yourself, but you also have to take others into consideration. To support our students in developing these skills, we have taught them Kelso’s Choices. Some of the wheel choices fall under Habit 1 Be Proactive while others fall under Think Win-Win: share and take turns, apologize, make a deal, talk it out. Through practicing these choices, our students are learning to have high levels of both courage and consideration.
As we move into the New Year consider which of these areas you may want to focus on: creating an abundance mentality, building an emotional bank account or balancing courage and consideration. Whichever one you choose to work, remember to be committed and accountable to your goal. On behalf of the staff and students, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier.
St. Teresa of Calcutta
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